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Metrosexual

from Twelve Inches Of Love by Biggus Diccus

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about

In which the Diccus stakes his claim to unreconstructed dinosaurness

lyrics

When I was a young boy
I thought I knew what made a man
You had to smell of sweat
Unfiltered cigarettes
And drink suds straight from the can

But on every corner now I see
Men with manicures
Back, sack and crack and chest hair wax
And wearing haute couture

Chorus:
Gregory Peck,
Steve McQueen,
And Edward G Robinson too
Wouldnt share a steak with Justin Timberlake
Even if you bought 'em a brew

Now I aint no kind of throwback
But what the hell is going on
And If you ever see me waxing my hairy back
You'll know that something is seriously wrong

Now I aint never washed my privates
Cause I like em the way they are
And if you've gotta use for more than two pairs of shoes,
I bet you dont even have a scar

I figure a manly musk,
Makes the girls drop dead from lust
And thats why I never change my clothes,
Till I can make em stand up on their own

I aint no metrosexual
Just look at my underwear drawer
Ten pairs of black boxer shorts,
Who could ever ask for more

Now I aint no metrosexual
I do my nails with a knife
And my nostril hair is so thick up there
That it sometimes threatens my life

Now I aint no metrosexual
Just look on my bathroom shelf
A bottle of Lynx for when I really stink
And I can happily live with myself.

credits

from Twelve Inches Of Love, released June 11, 2011

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